Emotional fatigue and how it can affect you during perimenopause and menopause

Fatigue during perimenopause and menopause

Physical fatigue is one of the most common perimenopause and menopause symptoms, and the majority of women will experience it at some point. So, it can be just symptoms like low energy. You can be physically sluggish. You find that your muscles are sore. So, fatigue can have a huge impact on your emotional and physical self, so it can sort of drain you. It can debilitate you. But we can also have what's called emotional fatigue.

One of the reasons we get fatigued is just the fact that all these physical changes are going on inside our bodies. We can be like ducks on a pond. Outside we can be all calm and collected, but inside, our body is moving like all those little duck's feet. We're also doing all the things that we normally do physically, so we're working, we're looking after family, we're multi-tasking, we're trying to be superwoman basically; and, as well as the physical fatigue, this can also impact us emotionally.

Symptoms of emotional fatigue

Emotional fatigue can be described as a sense of being emotionally overextended and exhausted. This is usually accompanied by physical exhaustion and fatigue, together with emotional symptoms such as:

Feeling drained emotionally or emotionally numb: You can feel drained emotionally. It's like you've got nothing else to give. Maybe you've lost your feelings for your partner or for your friends. You find family members totally irritating. You can't give anything back. You might feel that your emotional energy is low in all sorts of different ways.

We produce a hormone called oxytocin, which makes us feel like cuddling and being affectionate, bonding us to those around us. And if we lose that, then that can affect our relationship with absolutely everything. And we know that low oestrogen can go alongside lower levels of oxytocin.

Low mood: You might feel like your mood is very low and you feel down in the dumps.

Unmotivated / lack of motivation: You can feel totally unmotivated or lack motivation, or you might find that you just don't find joy in anything. You don't want to exercise. You don't want to go out with friends. You literally just want to run away and hide and just not be with anybody or do anything at all.

Lethargic / Bored / Tearful: You may find you're very lethargic or feel bored.

Tearful: Crying a lot or feeling on the verge of tears can often be an indication that you are emotionally fatigued.

Feeling overwhelmed: You might find that you're just totally overwhelmed by everything, you know, what's going on in your own life but also, at the minute, all the things that are going on around the world that are impacting us in many, many different ways.

Negative thinking: You might keep thinking negatively or negative thoughts keep popping into your mind.

Struggling to focus: You may find it difficult to focus, and your concentration can also be impacted by emotional fatigue.

Lack of creativity or imagination: You may be one of those people who are very artistic, such as creative writing or painting. And you may find that your creativity has just completely disappeared.

So, as you can see, emotional fatigue can be a horrible symptom, because it affects us in all sorts of different ways that can have a huge impact on our emotional well-being and how we feel about ourselves.

How to boost your mood and energy levels

So, what can you do to help yourself? Here are a few things I recommend.

Eat well and regularly: The really important thing, as with most symptoms, is to eat well. Remember, all of those physical changes that are going on require a huge amount of energy from your body, so the more nutrients you can give your body, the less of a struggle it's going to have - and that can help with all the symptoms here.

Make sure you eat little and often as well, to keep your blood sugar regulated. If your blood sugar goes haywire, which is really common in perimenopause and menopause, then that can have a huge impact on your mood and on your energy, literally within seconds. You can be fine one minute, and the next minute everything quickly goes downhill; so, it's really important to eat well and have those little, healthy snacks in between meals.

Stay hydrated: Remember the water because dehydration will affect you very, very quickly. We know that dehydration affects brain function. It can affect your nervous system, so it's a really important one here. And I can never stress how simple drinking water is and how big an impact it can have on your symptoms, so it's so worth trying.

Exercise regularly: It is important, but I do realise with this one, sometimes your motivation's gone, you're physically fatigued, the thought of going to the gym, or dance classes, or anything is just too much. In that situation, just a short walk, 10 or 15 minutes a day, just to get outside into the fresh air, and just to get your body and heart moving, if that is all you can manage, that is so much better than nothing at all. And it's really going to help to keep your circulation going too.

Increase your intake of magnesium: For those of you who have been following me for a long time, you will know that I recommend magnesium for so many things during perimenopause and menopause, including fatigue and your mood. You can add more magnesium-rich foods to your diet. Just Google and you'll get a really good, comprehensive list.

You can also top up your intake of magnesium with our Balance Perimenopause Multi-nutrient drink. This also contains other nutrients that can help support you in 10 different ways during perimenopause, including helping to reduce tiredness and fatigue.

If your periods are starting to tail off or they've stopped altogether, then you can look at our Menopause Support supplement. This contains magnesium, and also soya isoflavones, and hibiscus.

Take time to rest and relax not just your body but your mind too: 30-minutes of ‘me time’ each day is vital. It's not a luxury. So, make sure that you can do things like meditation, mindfulness, or deep breathing to help you relax.

Sometimes you need something new to get motivated again. And I know, I get so many people coming to me saying that there are things they used to do many, many years ago that they loved, and because of work and a busy life, these things have gone.

Maybe if there was something you loved doing a long time ago, then maybe pick that one up again, and you might find that it gives you a lovely little emotional boost when you do something that you really, really love.

Herbal help: If you're getting a low mood, you can look at the herb Hypericum. However, this is not recommended if you are on any of the prescribed medications, including HRT.

Put yourself first: Again, so important. If you are physically, emotionally, and mentally drained, how can you look after other people? You can't. So, you need to look after yourself first.

I have a lovely little motto, which is, "Don't do today what you can do tomorrow." And I find it really helpful, and this has stood me in good stead for so many years. I might be coming home from work and think, "Oh, the whole house needs hoovering." And I'm just thinking, "I'm too tired to do it." So, what I do is I think, "What's going to benefit me the most in this moment: clean carpets, or 30 minutes of relaxation and ‘me time’?" I can do the hoovering tomorrow, but today, I need that little bit of ‘me time’. So, hopefully, you might find this little saying helpful for yourself too, just to put everything into perspective.

I hope you found this one helpful. It really is very common. If you get to this stage, again, don't beat yourself up if you find that you really don't want to do anything. Very often, it's just one of those phases that you go through, and ease out of.

But if you're really struggling, either physically or emotionally, and you find that you just can't get back on your feet, then please do go and just talk to your doctor about this.

If any of you have experienced any of these situations, what have you done to change things? What have you found that has really helped you feel that little bit better? Please share your stories. I love reading them. We all do. And sharing them can help somebody else down the line as well.

Until next time, take care.

You may also find these topics helpful:

Types of fatigue in perimenopause and menopause & tips to boost your energy

6 good habits every menopausal woman needs to have

Emotional Menopause Symptoms: Why they can worsen or come back

Can menopause cause emotional detachment?